[NVIDIA] Fix build xformers >= cu129 (torch 2.9.0)

[johnnynunez]

What does this PR do?

Fixes #1320 #1308 #1323 #1335 and includes fixes for flash-attention >= CUDA 12.9 and adds cutlass v4.2.1 that fixes some kernels for Blackwell.
Also add support for Spark and Thor.
Added Blackwell family support. https://developer.nvidia.com/blog/nvidia-blackwell-and-nvidia-cuda-12-9-introduce-family-specific-architecture-features/

Thanks to: #1285 #1262 that are included here.

Fixes in flash-attention to support CUDA 13:

1. CUTLASS v4.2.1 Upgrade to cutlass v4.2.1 Dao-AILab/flash-attention#1905
2. C++11 fix warnings C++11 fix warnings Dao-AILab/flash-attention#1904
3. Blackwell family specific [NVIDIA] Enable Blackwell Family Specific Dao-AILab/flash-attention#1882
4. [BUILD] SBSA wheels + CUDA 13 Support [BUILD] SBSA wheels + CUDA 13 Support Dao-AILab/flash-attention#1865
5. [BUG] CUDA 13: make FA3 compatible with CUDA 13 Builds [BUG] CUDA 13: make FA3 compatible with CUDA 13 Builds Dao-AILab/flash-attention#1860

Pytorch 2.9.0 https://dev-discuss.pytorch.org/t/pytorch-2-9-rc1-produced-for-pytorch-audio-vision/3234

cc @sgrigory

[johnnynunez]

@jiawenliu64 @bottler @sgrigory could you run and merge?

[snakeeater4526]

just a little message to tell you that i believe that PR is needed hard for people on cuda 13, basically pytorch 2.9 is now the stable one, but the latest available xformers doesn't support cuda 13.

so some software ( like comfyui ) using tensor related stuff can't work properly.

ps: i'm not a dev at all, but i just tried for an entire day to use comfyui with TensorRT acceleration, and it's basically impossible with Cuda 13 drivers... ( did not managed to compile successfully this PR sadly )

[johnnynunez]

just a little message to tell you that i believe that PR is needed hard for people on cuda 13, basically pytorch 2.9 is now the stable one, but the latest available xformers doesn't support cuda 13.

so some software ( like comfyui ) using tensor related stuff can't work properly.

ps: i'm not a dev at all, but i just tried for an entire day to use comfyui with TensorRT acceleration, and it's basically impossible with Cuda 13 drivers... ( did not managed to compile successfully this PR sadly )

You have to export cccl to new ones. For me it is working.

[johnnynunez]

just a little message to tell you that i believe that PR is needed hard for people on cuda 13, basically pytorch 2.9 is now the stable one, but the latest available xformers doesn't support cuda 13.

so some software ( like comfyui ) using tensor related stuff can't work properly.

ps: i'm not a dev at all, but i just tried for an entire day to use comfyui with TensorRT acceleration, and it's basically impossible with Cuda 13 drivers... ( did not managed to compile successfully this PR sadly )

could you try again? it should be fixed